More Phrases for Mike to Avoid: I Should/Need To/Must Do This

Yep, here's another post about words and expressions that show my (lack of) acceptance of my TBI. Hopefully, I'm showing the massive link between how we feel about something and how we talk about it. For a long time, when I talked about how something hadn't worked out, I would say, "I should have done this", "I need to do this" or "in the future, I must do this". You're probably recognising a pattern here now. These are not phrases of acceptance.

My family became a little concerned with the intense way I was occasionally talking. They commented about it to me. I stopped and thought for a while before realising I was using them because I still felt like an adult who thinks he knows something of the world. I felt old enough not to be making such simple mistakes like that: "Come on, man. Sort it out! You're better than that!"

Of course, I was completely failing to accept I'd had a TBI. You can almost hear me adding, "Brain injury? What brain injury? You mean like what Uncle Ted had?" :-)

So I'd been thinking of myself as an adult. But, in many ways, I was starting my new life again. I was more like a baby or, at best, a toddler! It was as if everything that I'd done before was gone. I was starting over from scratch. It was as if I was experiencing every new situation for the first time. Everything was a learning opportunity. When I thought that, I no longer had cause to say, "I should have done that!" Instead, it became more fitting to say, "I've learnt from this and I won't do the same thing again."

It's all about perspective!

Cheers,
Mike