Proving People Wrong

Part Two of an Interview with Fellow TBI Recoverer, Johanna O’Connor – Her Sporting Achievements

This post obviously follows on from Part One of Johanna’s interview.

Johanna, can I now ask about how you returned to competitive sport?

After the accident, the doctors had said to me, with the damage I had to my shoulder and knees, I would not be able to swim or run again. After a month of being out of hospital, I went down to the pool- mainly to get me out of the house and stop me from going crazy. I started aqua jogging in the pool and cycling (on a simulator) to strength my legs.

Three months after the accident, I visited a knee surgeon. He explained to me that he could not operate yet as my legs where not strong enough, but he also made the fatal mistake of explaining to me that 'I could do no more damage than I already had done, so go out there and make the most of it'. This statement stuck with me. I also had time while I was sitting around, to think about what I had lost. I felt as though I had lost basically everything that I knew; my studies, my sport, my partner, my life.

So the very next day after seeing the surgeon I started training again (swimming, board paddling, and running) mainly for Surf Lifesaving competitions. I had previously been a pool swimmer doing 11+ pool sessions a week and had had an interest in Surf Lifesaving. That interest started just before I turned 19 when I was asked to compete at a New Zealand regional competition and after this competition was asked to be part of the New Zealand development squad. From there I socially competed in Surf Lifesaving. In February 2003, about six months before my accident, I was part of the NZ Under-23 team to represent New Zealand at the Tri Nations [Ed's note: This name refers to an event between the nations of New Zealand, Australia and South Africa]. This was my first NZ representative team.

What has your progress in the sport been like since your accident?

I trained hard and eight months after my accident was the trials for World Surf Lifesaving Championships, to be held in Italy in September 2004. At the New Zealand trials, I was the best performing woman. During those eight months, I had switched everything else in my life off and trained hard. Training is how I dealt with my emotional distress. It led to more physical pain, but dealing with that made me train harder still. It all definitely helped me to sleep at night without going through the hours of emotional distress of what life used to be like and the emotions of losing the first guy I ever loved.

I was named on the team to go to the World’s. My main event was the Surf Swim. I gained fourth place. At the time I was extremely disappointed about that, I only wanted first place. [Ed’s Note: Johanna may have been disappointed, but the rest of us are in awe of fourth place! This was, after all, the World Championships and it was less than twelve months after doctors had told her she would never swim again!]

Looking back on all I went through to get fourth place, though, I can honestly say I came a long way. I am happy with this thought, but now it has created the hunger in me to get that first place. Since then I have continued to perform and have now been on 8 New Zealand Representative teams. [Ed’s Note: Johanna most recently competed as part of the twelve-strong New Zealand team at the International Surf Challenge in Sydney, Australia in December, 2007.]

Your training must have been so difficult, especially at the beginning. What kept you going?

What started me off was depression!! I had lost everything I knew, I didn't get to go to my partner’s funeral, I was stuck on the couch with ankle to thigh leg braces on, I couldn't go anywhere. My life for the first few weeks of being at home was my room, bathroom, and lounge/kitchen. After sitting around for so long I was uncomfortable at how my body was changing- I used to be a thin, athletic person, and I was turning into (as my friend put it) a normal looking girl. All the things I had taken for granted like; standing up by myself, showering myself, and all the others e.g driving car, general walking etc. It was horrible - I was relying on other people all the time! I hated this. I wanted to do it when I wanted to and how I wanted to!

The doctors were telling me about not being able to swim or run again hit me hard - real hard. I could not handle it. Then came the knee surgeon’s words, 'You can't do any more damage...’. He also said I probably wouldn't be able to run till Feb, and we were in October. The very next day, I was training with the mentality, "I can't do any more damage". I tried to run and swim again. Swimming was painful. I went from before the accident doing 8-9km in 2hours, to swimming 1km in 40min's for the first week ,which built up to 2km in 1hour in the 2nd week and slowly progressed from there. [Ed’s note: If that swimming pace makes readers feel uncomfortable, I can assure them that, despite training, my own pace has never been anything close to that good! :-)]

Running: wow this was slow! I had no strength (I struggled to walk up stairs) but I slowly got faster over time. At the World’s in 2004, I was even managed to run in the beach running relay.

Training was extremely difficult; the pain was some times so intense. This would be from scar tissue stretching or knees failing on me or the continual shoulder pain or running 2 days after a piece of bone being removed from my hip to reconstruct my face, plus the many other operations I encountered. The pain is indescribable, but for the reasons explained, I pushed through, even though I couldn't walk after some sessions due to my knees giving out. Having a head injury helped me to concentrate on myself and getting myself better.

My head injury damaged my social ability and my reasoning, so I was stubborn, I would not listen to people telling me not to go training. My intolerance made it hard for me to deal with people. When people kept telling me I couldn't do this or that, I hated it I could do it and I would prove to them all that I could. So another reason I was able to push through the pain, was to prove to myself and the people around me that I was no push over, and once I realised I could do it I wanted to prove them all wrong, including myself.

When it comes down to it this was my second chance - the chance Jared never got. I had to make the most of it and get myself right.

Thanks for taking the time to talk to us, Johanna. Best of luck from us here at Howtorecover with your further adventures. We are very sure you will make the most of your second chance! Those readers interesting in hearing more of Johanna's story can start by trying this online newspaper article.